Most new couples to the lifestyle have many preconceived ideas about swing clubs and think that these clubs are all orgy houses. Nothing could be further from the truth. Everything in the lifestyle is consensual. You may or may not find a matching partner or couple, but no one is permitted to just take liberties with you or your partner.
Choosing a couple at Club Whispers
Club Whispers with its edgy atmosphere is erotic and sensual in nature, not totally sexual.
Many couples that visit Club Whispers, visit for many different reasons, some like flirting, for others it is exhibitionism, or perhaps its voyeurism. For some it’s just checking out what the club is about, then we have those who are here spicing up a marriage and the list could go on forever but you get the idea.
Not every couple wants to find a sexual playmate.
If it is your first time visiting a lifestyle club, please let us know when you arrive and whenever possible our host and/or hostess will not only give you a guided tour and help you settle in, but they will also introduce you to as many people as possible. Let us know what type of couple you are looking for. If you are both interested in swinging, exhibitionism or just meeting new couples, don't hesitate to be specific in your request. In most cases new couples will want to watch other couples in action prior to approaching them in a club atmosphere.
Most swingers are very outgoing people and many of them will not be shy to introduce themselves to you.
If you spot a couple that you find attractive. Ask your partner if they find the same couple attractive. If the feeling is mutual, both of you should go together and introduce yourselves, perhaps ask them if you could join them for a drink so they can help answer some of your questions.
Be sure and let the new couple you are meeting with, know what your interests are in the lifestyle. If you have no interest in just socializing and want a sexual encounter with other sexually open couples, it is important you meet with other couples with this same interest.
What If The Couple Does Not Want Us?
Every person or couple is different. This is what makes the lifestyle so exciting and enjoyable. If everyone was the same, life would be quite boring now wouldn’t it. People come in every shape, size, colour, religion and different levels of sexual play. It is very flattering when someone wants to play with you, but if you are not interested or nervous, be polite in saying "thank you for asking, but not right now".
If you are turned down (and you will be - it happens to every couple) don't take the rejection personally! Be polite and move on to the next couple. Remember, if you were turned down, it is their loss not yours. We have never met a couple that could not find matching couples in the lifestyle. The key is to be outgoing, (personal hygiene and grooming is fundamental) and a warm smile and friendly tone will get you many introductions. Many couples might say no the first night you meet, especially if they are new themselves or nervous. It is amazing how many couples you thought had no interest in you, will get together with you in the future.
This is why we recommend you never burn any bridges along the way!
Never give or ask a reason for rejection. This is considered very inappropriate in and will usually hurt someone's feelings. If you were interested in someone or a couple and they reject you, be sure not to lay down the "Never Talk to Us Again Sign". Every person or couple goes at their own pace and every "NO" does not mean forever.
What If We Only Want a Threesome?
Threesomes are very hard to plan or arrange if you are entering the lifestyle for the first time. How would you feel on your first visit to a lifestyle club and a couple approached you and told you they only want to play with the female partner and not have the male involved or vice versa?
Threesomes are very hard to ask for if it is your first time at a club. You need to get to know many couples first. Sometimes couples will resort to telling lies to get the threesome they want. Please don't do this! This is called playing head games and people will not appreciate being lied too.
Our recommendation is to look to single people to make up the threesome, rather than trying to work out which couples may or may not entertain you only playing with one of them and not the other.
If you are attending a club or party with your partner for the first time, make sure you both find a matching partner and go play as a foursome in the same room. One of the biggest enjoyments in swinging is seeing your partner having fun with a new playmate.